My calling as a healer surfaced a couple of years ago, in September 2018. I'm a working mum of two children, living in Belgium with my Flemish husband, and I come from Latvia originally. I was diagnosed with a parental burnout in 2017. It came due to several reasons, one of them was lack of any grandparental support. So, you get it because you don’t have help around. And then you don’t get any help when the parental burnout hits you, because it’s not recognised as the professional burnout is.
This Covid-19 pandemic lock down has left many parents with a double triple quadruple load of caring responsibilities. Parenting is not valued in our society, not recognised, it’s invisible and unpaid. And there is no talking at all about how the children feel without their school routines, without their friends, and with closed playgrounds. I have to work, home-school, cook more meals than before, deal with kids tantrums more often than before because the only outside activity is cycling or walking. People without children can work the same or even more hours as before. But for parents, the load has at least doubled, if not tripled. For working mothers, who were already working a double shift, it’s like a double double shift. And I mean, we are dividing care-taking, parenting, house-holding tasks with my husband more or less equally. But when children are still young, they need their mummies sometimes more than the dads. And more often than not, we are both equally exhausted.
I feel struggling, angry, overwhelmed, annoyed, undervalued as a parent during this pandemic. Anything how we feel while ploughing through these times is just that - how we feel – nothing wrong about that. And yet. I was patronised by somebody (who has no kids) that I should feel privileged to still have a job. As if being a mother is not real work. Well, as a working mother without any support from a wider family I actually feel exhausted and overwhelmed, and quite surprised that people find time to judge mothers. Parents are giving up sleep, personal care, and their hobby or I would call it soul feeding time to deal with all the tasks on all the fronts 24/7.
So, what do I do these days? I meditate, every day, for about 2 years now, and I started about 5-6 years ago with a regular practice of kundalini yoga. This type of yoga practice includes physical exercises, breathing, mantra chanting, meditation, life style, community. It helps me grounding and it helped me out of my burn-out.
I organise Women's circles because I believe that societal change can come not only from outside political and civic movements, but also from within. It's my responsibility to get rid of childhood conditioning, to heal old wounds (my mum has narcissistic and borderline issues). I want to enjoy myself and my life, I want and do feel good in my body, and my mind. And I don't need to leave my mess for my children to clean it up. I do it myself. I do it for myself, an for them, and for the Mother Earth.
Back to what I do in the Women's circles. Before Roman calendar was introduced with 12 solar months, many ancient civilizations followed a calendar of 13 lunar months (28 days x 13 = 364!), which made more sense according to the rhythms of Nature, of the planets, and women's individual cycles. Anthropologists have discovered that in ancient civilizations, for example, Aztecs and Mayas, these were women who discovered astrology and astronomy - because planets and stars are in constant flow and movement, as well as the seasons in Nature, as well as the cycles of women. The ancient people knew - when women come together, magic happens. For them, it was real, deep wisdom and way of life. (Compare this to the fact that in the Western art, for the past 2000 years, there has been no piece of art depicting a birthing woman!) That's why I started Women's circles in the first place - to tap into our inner powers and return to our true selves, growing together in shedding the societal (or patriarchal) conditioning and learning together who we truly are.
Recovering from my burn-out, I discovered closing the bones healing, which is initially a post-partum healing ceremony to help the new mother close her bones after the very opening experience of childbirth. I did a training, and I give this healing ceremony since September 2018, and I can say it has such a deep and profound effect on women. This healing process helps any woman (and also men) with hips! It is an ancient wisdom, a ceremony to be held for healing deep transformations and changes in life, to heal losses, to heal narcissistic wounds, and so many more emotional and spiritual conditions. And here we come to my true passion and calling of my life - the path of the wounded healer, the path of the intuitive and spiritual healer - a shaman. I perform the closing the bones belly and hip massage as part of the ceremony, and I also include shamanic practices of calling for ancestral help - I make it a deeply spiritual experience. This healing can reach several generations back.
My value and belief system is based on constant growth and change, on honouring my own natural cycles, as well as the cycles and rhythms of the Nature - Mother Earth, the Moon. In my worldview, intellect, intuition and instinct are all equally important parts in us, and the true wisdom is to integrate them all. That's what intelligence means for me. Intellect will be always limited without the intuition. I'm sharing my stories because I believe they can help other women heal and feel inspired to own their life, to heal and rise. Welcome to my blog! And welcome to Women's circles, or healing ceremonies if you wish!
In the upcoming posts I'd like to talk about the importance of being a mother and taking time to heal after giving birth; on spiritual inner work to own our powers inspired from goddesses of ancient civilizations; on the fight between the mind and the heart in the Western culture, on womb as women's power centre; absurdities of patriarchy, and more and more. There is so much to discover beyond the materialistic, physical, visible world!
Let's rise together, Moon Sisters!
Love, light and blessings,
Laura
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